First Place
For many years Gary had been nurtured solely of by his mother, maturing with a deficiency in essentials such as taking responsibilities and appreciation of others. However, over the duration they barely gleaned more than a few personal details about each other’s deeper feelings other than routine habits and preferences. Personal emotions rarely, if ever, surfaced. Consequently, Gary had difficulty in forming relationships and even if he were too, they were short-lived. He was also unmindful of unwarranted manoeuvres regarding his personal and of secure matters.
Despite veiled itineraries from one another, the two had welded like a well-oiled machine mechanism until it began to reveal cracks during the last year or so. Gary began to contemplate if his life had a lack of purpose. He mused, “If I can’t lead a normal life, how can I be my own man!” He acknowledged to himself that daily living was never made unbearable by unanticipated circumstances and he troubles he did have were relegated into orderly ones due to his mother’s interventions. And so, he had unwittingly become dependent on her in any decisions of importance, even a career choice. Now half of him was resentful of her strong influence while the other half comfortable with the status quo. Could he shift this balance into a liberated one?
Gary was 24 years old and when he thought about it he had only a vague memory of his father who died when he was at the age of four. Ever since he had spent the years with only his mother. No siblings, no grandparents, no aunts – nobody to shape alternative views or explore ideas with. Without siblings to have to share with, he wasn’t inclined to making friends. His mother adapted to the dual role of being both parents and wore the two hats contentedly. The two remained in the same house, a modest but efficacious one in the suburbs, with the third bedroom eventually becoming a shared office for both. It was semi-divided when he became a teenager but his mother’s essence was always omnipresent even in his half of the room. Absence of true independence over even his space was a constant irritant.
His mother Betty, had a zeal for life, on her own terms of course, self-determining without a need for close friends or even an inquisitive interest in her neighbours or neighbourhood whatsoever. Gary was the only person in her life, one that she was contented to protect and nurture, and his company was sufficient involvement to displace any thoughts of isolation.
Other than Gary, her second passion was discovering what the future might hold for them before it even happened. It might be a big job promotion in the wind, striking it rich on a lottery or learning of a potential illness. Whatever was in store she wanted to be prepared for the consequences? Her quest for such knowledge of the future meant appointments with numerous psychics and fortune tellers for hints of portents, realizing full well the readings and predictions were no certainty. But if a few readings for instance were somewhat aligned that could be an important indication. Today’s visit was meaningful and hit to the point, “Your son will soon meet the girl of his dreams.” She had wanted to hear that so earnestly; it rang home as sure as discovering alcohol in a pub. A third person to augment their family would be fulfilling, not Gary running off with just any floozy. It had to be deliberate to not lose her son but gain a daughter to replace some of the emptiness she struggled with for so many years after losing her husband, especially the feminine sort. Gary’s presence made up for much but not enough. He did deserve romance in his life and if that meant a third person in the house, it would satisfy her need as well as keep him at home. She believed that she and Gary were destined to be bonded together until her life was completed.
Anxious to bring him the good news, she started rushing to arrive before he did. A nasty flashback of what a neighbour had said made her shudder momentarily. She had never forgiven being accused of emotionally abusing her son. The audacity – to suggest she was deceptive in her relationship with Gary and shaping his perceptions to complement her own. As usual, her longish dishevelled hair had a mind of its own, in contrast to an upright body of fluid motion. Outfitted in fashionable clothing as well, she caught more admiring looks than a woman in her mid-forties might have otherwise.
Gary, barely making it through the doorway and upon hearing of another psychic’s scatter-brained prediction, refuted it before it was fully spelled out. Although courteous of his mother’s wishes, interference had gone on far too long. He had to shut it down – but hadn’t the courage to take a stand and demand that his decisions were to be his alone. She was always able to persuade him how well off he was just as things were. Gary blamed himself for being so unassertive. Even with the comforts of home, it didn’t quell his tears of anguish, tears that witnessed great courage, the courage of being able to suffer in silence!
Gary was receiving encouraging overtures from a pretty girl at work lately which made the news flash from the psychic even more resentful. He worried that if this infatuation with Sarah blossomed his mother would drive her away or at the least, take the credit for them meeting up.
Gary contemplated his sparse involvement in the dating scene – only three or four girls, all fizzling out after a few dates. “I wouldn’t be surprised if mother had a hand in it in some manner,” he figured. He began spending more of his free moments at work chatting with Sarah. He was attracted to her and hoped it was reciprocal. She was always on his mind and he pictured their future as a couple. His engineering know-how and her financial background, a good benefit for starters! Mesmerized by the thought, he dwelled deeper. A little panic set in. He had no experience in love-making but what about her? If she had been active, could he handle it maturely without judgement? As usual, his insecurity went into overdrive!
A few weeks later he discussed his budding relationship with Sarah with his mother. She jumped right in, “I knew it, the psychic said so.” He shot back more resolutely than usual that he taken up with Sarah before the psychic’s shot-in-the-dark, in his own defense. He then suggested that Sarah join them for a dinner. A day was decided on.
Dinner on the Friday evening went effortlessly. If the two women were curious about each other, subtly was the mode. They talked mostly about clothing and shoes, both well-informed in that field. The evening was so pleasing that it was settled on the spot that Friday evening dinners would be a good choice for the foreseeable future.
The unison among the three of them evolved like a well-practiced song and the circle was completed. Gary in turn, was more content than ever, enjoying double attention from the two women. They were courteous with each other and both offered suggestions for the well-being of Gary, if not in competition with each other, then in complicity. As the weeks rolled by, Sarah was invited to stay overnight. She would bunk on a day-bed in the office. That overnight stay eventually became more often than not. Although there was ample affection between the couple, Gary hadn’t the bravado to visit Sarah during the night and neither had she hinted at such a rendezvous.
Eventually, whispers of a wedding cropped up – a small one though. But where would they live? Not on the horizon until now, it was much too late to undertake a difficult decision as searching for living quarters? Betty came to the rescue. She judiciously influenced the outcome of the couple to reside in this house for six months or so.
The wedding was held the next week before a justice of the peace. Sarah slept in Gary’s bed for the first time. Both played their part during the sexual role, not with the passion that Gary had anticipated but rather a mutual sharing such as maybe very close friends might have delighted in. This union became somewhat irregular over time, never an urgency nor a priority. Their careers were of uppermost priority. Meanwhile Betty took on a feeling of ample fulfillment that had been missing. She found herself planning the futures of all three more and more.
It was as if they had molded into a triangle from the circle bond. Two of the three sides were prominent, more so than Gary’s, who was so mollified by the arrangement, he was ignorant in his bliss. The friendship between the women was progressing past the point of simply partaking. Romance was in the air. Betty initiated the obvious but Sarah was quick to agree.
Over dinner that evening, the rather jaw-clenching proposition to Gary was, “We are very fond of each other like we are fond of you but we want to share a bed every second night – if you would agree, of course?” Gary, nearly choking on his food, had the quick thinking to picture the possibilities. If they were happier he would be happier. He would sleep sounder on the nights he was alone and when his mother died, he and Sara would have the whole house to themselves. In a flash he gave his stamp of approval.
Life progressed for months without a hiccup. Then another joint dinner meeting was called for. The tension could be cut with a knife. For the very first time Gary was fearful of what might be coming. He was right to feel that way sensing that their trio may be reduced to a duo. He was correct. An apartment with all the amenities had been arranged for him across town – the ties were broken.
As time went by, a few years in fact, the female relationship with too big an age gap to bind it together slipped apart. Sarah left without a forwarding address and with all her belongings. It wasn’t long before Betty’s loneliness turned into a chronic depression. Everything was collapsing around her. Then she thought, “Maybe Gary will come back home!”
She dug out his address, praying that he was still there. She hadn’t talked to him since he had left. She was nervous on the drive over and after parking in front of his building shook uncontrollably before finally exiting the car. He opened the door on the first ring as if to welcome his mother inside. Not so, it was just the opposite: She was gruffly told to leave before she could get a word out. She halted a moment with a bowed head, so humiliated by his rejection but not fully understanding why, then turned and sluggishly left!
Gary had made great strides in his career since being released from bondage, first becoming free of his mother, then his wife, neither meaning anything to him. In fact he didn’t even raise an eyebrow when he read of his of his mother’s suicide a couple of months later.
